Jerks & Irks XLVIII: What is WITH People?

What can I say about social networking? It’s love-hate for me. Social networking is supposed to be about meeting, connecting with, and making friends with like-minded people without ever having to leave the comfort of your home. That sounds pretty love-inspiring to me.

But over the last few days, several people conspired to spoil the love. Separately, of course. Serendipitously? I never know with that word. Anyway, one instance, I shrugged off. The second, I complained about to my hubby and my girlfriend. But the third and fourth? Jerks and Irks Status.

  1. Last week, I received the following direct message on Twitter: “Can I pick your brain sometime? Met you last year at ASJA and your book is doing better than mine! Would love some tips.” Umm, How about, “Hello, how are you? Congrats on Blood in Past’s recent high rankings!” (I was in the middle of my sale weekend and Blood in the Past was only two spots behind one of the Dexter novels!) But no, she just jumped right into me helping her out because when I met her at the ASJA (American Society of Journalists & Authors) conference, I was just a blogger and she was a little farther along in her journey and now I seemed to be doing a little better and it was boggling her mind so much she abandoned sheer etiquette and all use of pleasantries. Lovely. By the way. I responded with my email address, because I’m A NICE PERSON, and was met with nothing. Super lovely.
  2. Then, one of the authors I follow on Facebook put out a call for beta readers. He said it was a thriller, so I jumped at the chance to help, commenting that I would be happy to be a beta and that I welcomed the chance to meet and work with another thriller writer. Well, said author sends me a direct message on Facebook that although very thorough, was extremely cold and uninviting. It started with “Hi Ava” then went right into “Where are you in your writing career? Do you know what a beta reader is? Have you ever been a beta reader before? What is your blood type?” I can appreciate trying to weed out people just looking for a free book before its release or whatever, but maybe, I don’t know, say that! Have some energy, some personality. Connect, for heaven’s sake! His direct message was so cold that, coupled with his ridiculous time constraints, I politely declined my original offer to help out. And–what a shock–he didn’t reply back a simple “Thanks, anyway” or anything like that.
  3. Next, I got the following direct message on my Facebook author page: “I’m told you know how an author can gift books through Amazon for free. Can you tell me how?” Again, ZERO salutations, no mention of who sent them, what the hell? I’m pretty sure this person isn’t even a fan of my author page. But I’m a glutton for punishment, so I answered their question and I will most likely die of old age while waiting for them to miraculously ‘grow’ manners and say “Thank you.”
  4. The fourth instance occurred somewhere in the midst of the above events. I received an auto DM on Twitter asking if I was an author and if I would be interested in doing a guest post for the person I’d just followed. I usually hate auto DMs, and rid my inbox of them quicker than most people rid their bodies of crabs. But this time I responded. My Twitter pal and I agreed upon a date for my guest post to appear, right in the middle of my sale weekend, and I worked writing it into my busy schedule. Only, when I emailed it to her, I didn’t get a response. I contacted her on Twitter and she then emailed me saying she had received my material and would be in touch. Then the date for my guest post to go live came and went and I checked her websites and didn’t see my post. I emailed her. I tweeted her. I DMed her. Nothing. So then I scheduled the post for my own blog and according to the hits and comments and Twitter shares, it was her damn loss. And for the record, I think her first name is stupid

Have any of you had any run-ins with social networking jerks recently? Feel free to rant about it in the comments section! I always love hearing from people because I know how to do social networking the right way and I always respond in a friendly and timely manner. 😉

13 thoughts on “Jerks & Irks XLVIII: What is WITH People?

  1. I have had a similar experience. There was one person that started asking questions about how to publish on Kindle, which I politely responded with a few links to helpful resources. The person then sent a message to one of his buddies stating that I had agreed to help publish the e-book. Say what? I was still nice and forwarded the links to his friend (who had apparently helped him publish on CreateSpace). He then later asked where the link to his ebook was? Again . . . WHAT???? Now I don’t mind helping folks out (within reason), but for this person to automatically assume I was going to do the work for him was unbelievable.

  2. I was a beta reader for one woman’s novel maybe a year or so ago. I kept in contact with the author as I went along, keeping her up to date with whatever cropped up in my life to delay my response. She was very nice and understanding about it, so I was surprised when I got no response to my full critique. I figured she didn’t take criticism too well and would rather pretend I’d never read her novel.

    A few months later, I hit a wall in my own writing. I sent her a polite email asking how she was and if she remembered me at all. I got a positive response, then asked her if she would mind giving me her thoughts on a scene I had trouble writing–I even clarified that I came to her for help because I remembered a specific scene from her novel that I really loved that was similar to what I was working on. She said she’d love to help, and she got all excited that someone actually wanted her help with writing. So I asked my question and haven’t gotten an answer since then.

    • That’s pretty weird. Why are people so damn weird? I’ve since gotten a second DM from the ASJA person saying they had gotten busy and were going to email me that day. And nothing… I’ve also gotten an email from the guest post lady saying we never agreed on a date and I shouldn’t expect service when I didn’t pay for service, or something like that. Too bad I didn’t save the DMs from her to prove her wrong. Ugh.

      • I wish I could explain it. I”m still a bit sore over a local newspaper and the runaround they sent me on. To make a long story short, they gave me a lot of contradicting instructions on how to get in touch with who was in charge which led up to me never getting a response and them forever missing out on the skills I have to offer.

  3. WOW. You did not say, that you disliked her first name. (LOL)
    But, yes. The idea that people will come and sort of bust in on your train of thought, uninterested in connecting, is *so* very off-putting. It almost sounds spammy. If you’re a real person, and your direct messages are spammy, something is definitely wrong. :-/

    “without ever having to leave the comfort of your home.” > Definitely not something I, personally, find myself complaining about. Haha.

    • Well I didn’t like her first name, but she’s foreign so whatever. I actually saw the name again elsewhere and was annoyed. Almost as annoyed as I am by spammy people and having to leave my home to make friends. Lol

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