Jerks & Irks XXXVI: 50 Shades of Writing Advice?

Just when I’ve finally decided to stop hating all over what people have read and enjoyed…decided to embrace 50 Shades of Grey as a catalyst for people reading more than they have since they were forced to read Lord of the Flies in high school…I found this out:

E.J. James is publishing a writing advice guide. Sort of.

Cue *facepalm*

Yes, I know it’s technically a journal that happens to contain writing tips and advice in it. And I know this news broke a while ago, but I was too busy explaining why I won’t read your book and I totally forgot to complain about this new development.

To be clear, I’ve never read 50 Shades of Grey. I did, however, read the reviews. Many of which contained excerpts. And I was unimpressed. The kicker? I don’t have any formal literary training. I went to school for Biology. And I was still unimpressed. What might that infer? Hmmmm?

So for little ole’ E.L. to come out with a journal that includes “professional advice” is just baffling. How baffling? Allow me to paint you a picture.

E.L. James Publishing a Writing an Advice Guide is Like…

  • Lindsay Lohan Opening a Rehab Center
  • Joan Rivers Preaching About Aging Gracefully & Naturally
  • Paris Hilton Giving Resume Tips
  • Taylor Swift Singing About Healthy, Long-Term Relationships
  • The Duggars Advocating Birth Control

Oh, and the title of this project? 50 Shades of Grey: Inner Goddess.

Maybe Ms. James simply has a great sense of humor. I mean, she’d have to in order to name her journal/writing guide after quite possibly the most annoying aspect of her books, right?

*This is not an April Fool’s post. This is really happening. Heaven help us all.


12 thoughts on “Jerks & Irks XXXVI: 50 Shades of Writing Advice?

  1. Say. It. Ain’t. So. I refuse to read 50 Shades just because I don’t do the erotica thing. On moral grounds. But I have definitely heard from many reputable sources that it’s horribly, horribly written. As in, as bad or worse than Twilight (which I also refuse to read on grounds that vampires don’t sparkle. Even I find that ludicrous and I don’t read about vampires ever!) UGH!!!!

  2. Lindsey Lohan opening a Rehab Center lmfao. I absolutely love that! Frankly it takes a lot of nerve on E.L. James’s part to give anyone advice on anything, let alone writing, but that title takes the cake.

  3. Oh man, I completely agree! Ms. James joins the rank of a growing number of best-selling crappy writers. I just don’t get it. Here we are, working at developing excellence in our craft, and the readers of the world accept the junk that continues to be churned out at an alarming rate. E.L. James would be the last person from whom I’d take any kind of writing advice.

    • I agree. You know, I wonder if she even had any beta readers? Or maybe her beta readers were other non-reading, attention-starved mommies. Real beta readers wouldn’t have let that mess be published as is.

    • Hahahaha! I don’t do bad writing either. I downloaded the sample of the first book (just to see what all the hoopla was about. I did the same with the Hunger Games and Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.). I couldn’t even get through a couple pages of the SAMPLE! Agghh!

  4. I don’t get why she’s writing a guide to writing? Hasn’t she got another book to be working on? I’ve not read any of those books, for one I’ve heard they started off as Twilight FanFic but I’ve heard they are written very badly. And for two its a craze. Give it another six months and there will be another pile of rubbish in the bargain buckets at motorway services.

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