How many of you are on Twitter?
*Surveys crowd raising their collective hands.*
Ok, how many of you are constantly annoyed by other people’s tweets?
*Notices no hands have gone down.*
Now, I’m excited to be going on a couple of weeks straight without a suspension, but sometimes I wonder why in the fiery red heck I was so depressed to be without Twitter when these are the things that annoy me on an hourly basis (Yes, I check Twitter that often):
1. Spam-a-lot Spambots: Go away, all of you! I don’t want to work from home and earn $8.2 zillion dollars a minute, I don’t want to buy your special tupperware, and I don’t want to be a beta reader for your imaginary “publising” company. That’s right, I got a spammerific offer to be a beta reader for Ristrict Publishing. If you google them, they don’t even have a website. They have a Twitter account (where they talk about their budding “publising” company in their profile), a Facebook page, and a youtube book trailer for something called Thuggin In Miami or something. Alrighty then…
2. Inspirational Quotes…on Repeat: I hate when I see a good quote, such as “All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them” (Walt Disney), and then I see it again, and again, and again…by the same PERSON! It comes across as a fake attempt to seem “real.”
3. Teaser Tweets for books: Normally I love these and I have even purchased a few books based on an intriguing sentence the author has posted on Twitter. But I hate the ones that post mundane sentences like “Betty had a hankering for pancakes but knew she was out of Nutella.” That is not a compelling sentence, people. Not in ANY genre. Sorry.
4. High & Mighty Hashtags: I #hate #tweets that #looklike this for #no #reason and it #makesmewantto #start a #hashtag #topic called #Ihopeyourshoebecomesuntiedandyoufalldownthestairs.
5. Killing me with Klout: Why, oh why, do some people log onto Klout and give a measley little Klout point to 839 of their closest friends and associates? It clogs up the twitter feed like chicken guts poured down the drain of a kitchen sink. Stop it! (Unless you want to give ME Klout. My score is only like a 23 or something.)
So there you have it. My love/hate relationship with Twitter. I can’t live with it, but when they suspend me, I whine a lot. (Feel free to follow me though, I don’t do any of those things I listed above.)
What do you hate about Twitter?