For the fourth installment of my Jerks & Irks series, I would very much like to rant about the excruciating process of cleaning out my Yahoo mailbox and why Yahoo must think I said something about its mother or kicked its puppy. This process is especially taxing on Mondays, since I try not to really use the computer on Sundays when Hubby-pants is home, allowing the emails to really pile up.
A little backstory: my original email address, created in 1999, includes the #69 in it. I know, I know. Feel free to judge me. I was 17 years old, a freshman in college, and having the #69 in your email address or AIM screen name was the IN thing to do, so bite me. Anyway, I recently decided to get a big-girl email address with just my first name and my new married last name. How professional! So my original, immature, kama sutra email address receives coupons, Living Social deals, Victoria’s Secret sales, travel site deals, etc. My big-girl email address receives everything relating to jobs, writing, and blogging. Thanks to all the lovely fellow bloggers I subscribe to, I receive about 80+ emails a day. Holy crap! Then, when I skip Sundays, I end up with about 200 emails by Monday morning. Here’s where my griping begins…
I should be able to simply go through my emails, one by one, and decide if I want to read more, delete it, or save it. This should be a continuous, pain-free process until my inbox says there are no more unread emails. But Yahoo apparently hates me and everything I stand for as a person. After checking half a dozen emails, it freezes. Not my computer. Not the entire Yahoo site. Just the email page. What happens is this: I decide I don’t want a particular email, I click Delete, and the email stays on the page, mocking my frustration, whispering to the Delete Button, and having a giggle at my expense. When this happens, the email counter to the left that displays how many emails remain, decreases by one! Its on MY side! Its got MY back! So I click on my friend, the email counter, to bring me to the full list of emails that remain in my inbox. And guess what? The email I just deleted is gone. Phew! So I click on the next email to be read. You know what pops up? THE EMAIL I DELETED!!! NO!More snickering and giggling occur. The emails and the Delete Button are having a field day and I am pulling my hair out one strand at a time while cursing under my breath. So I close the web browser. I reopen the web browser. I return to Yahoo. “Hi AVA” it says. Don’t “Hi AVA” me! I go to my inbox and everything works as it should and all is back to normal…Until about 7 emails later when this entire process repeats itself. So when you see a notification that says I “Liked” or “Commented” on one of your posts from last Tuesday, I wasn’t walking down memory lane; Yahoo was just being a gigantic JERK! (But not the email counter, he’s my friend, but he gets bullied by the emails and the Delete Button. Apparently, I need more powerful Yahoo friends. No offense, email counter.)
By the way, my Twitter account is STILL suspended, so “Like” me on Facebook. If you don’t, my feelings will get hurt. I’m sensitive like that. : )